A BIG weekend

This past weekend we visited the Park Avenue Armory in Manhattan to see Anthropodino, the large scale interactive installation by Brazilian artist Ernesto Neto. I have never seen such a BIG installation, made even better by the Park Avenue Armory's majestic interior, we felt like little ants. The installation was fun to explore and stimulating for the senses. There was a mysteriously good smell in the air, and then I realized that the hanging bags were stuffed with different spices like chamomile, cinnamon, cloves and paprika. There were many smaller "rooms" to climb into, a red room, a ball room, a soft room...all making you feel something different.
A wonderful place to explore and get lost!

Inspiration...

Getting back into the studio after my show is a little hard. Once I finish a body of work and put a show together, I end up missing all of those paintings once they have left my studio. Like good friends, they surrounded me, inspired me and I became used to their presence. Now I emerge into a new space where I am looking for new inspiration, images, colors... going to the art store for new supplies. It is an exciting time full of promise. I can't wait to see where this new inspiration takes me and the work!

On my shoulder

Late afternoon....busy day....perfect light....playing in the yard....moment to rest on my shoulder.

When they don't need me so much, in days and years to come, these are the moments that I will remember.

Maypole

Our Waldorf group's Maypole celebration had been rained out twice (twice!) this spring, but finally today we celebrated springtime on the most gorgeous day. Sunny and warm. First we all sat together and wove crowns of flowers for all of the children and some of the adults (me of course). Then we sang and walked the ribbons around the pole! So simple, touching and exciting for everyone! Spring in full bloom.

Prints!

I'm so excited that the prints of my paintings are finally in! They are for sale in my Etsy shop and at Swallow, where the show of my paintings is on view through September. They look absolutely beautiful, printed on a heavy weight archival watercolor paper with a torn edge all around. What I love is that they look like pieces of art in themselves, you would not have to know that they are from a painting.
They look especially lovely against our purple bedroom walls, clipped to my inspiration wire.

Jasper's animal portraits

Jasper's first favorite thing was animals. Even when he was a year old and could not yet speak words he could roar like a lion. At two he would impress visitors by pointing at a book and naming an Okapi or a Kookaburra, things that some of the adults had never heard of. So began a love affair that has resulted in our home being invaded by a vast collection of animal figures. Along with his new found interest in the camera this photo shoot from a few days ago makes perfect sense.





I'm loving his compositions!

Opening!

The Opening of my show at Swallow was last night! What a wonderful time we all had. I hung the show with the gallery owners in the morning....well, I mainly watched as they expertly arraigned my work into beautiful groupings on the walls. Then we came back to the gallery in the evening to gather with friends, drink lovely wine and talk about my work. For me, it was a wonderful celebration to see this body of work up on the walls, finished and complete. I felt proud especially because it says everything that I want it to say.

As all artists know, there is nothing quite like hearing someone talk about your work as if they see inside your head while you are making it! This is a rare moment...and this happened for me last night, with this body of work. I recently reworked my artist statement, I will share it here soon, and I think that the act of reworking my ideas into words gave me a clarity of purpose in the work since January. I am learning what a blessing giving your self limitations can be!

I'll be enjoying memories of this celebration for a while!

Running Around

Usually I look forward to Wednesdays and Thursdays, those are my studio days each week. That scheduled creative time to myself that centers me and rejuvenates every other area of my life.
Not so this week. The opening of my show at Swallow is Thursday evening and it feels like there are a million things to do before then and I'm trying to do it all.
On top of that BOTH kids are sick. Jasper: 3rd ear infection of the year, Carys: mystery fever.
Before I have an opening my "self doubt voices" are always strong.... Who do I think I am having a show? Will anyone come? Will they like the work? Will anything sell?.... Since becoming a mama the voices always include questions about the selfishness of putting so much effort into something that is not my children! This time with the kids sick it is worse and I have been experiencing triggers of self doubt over the past couple of days that feel almost paralyzing. The hardest question: "Why do I think that I can do all of this, being a mom and an artist and do a good job at it all?" I am being stretched thin as they need me so much and I need myself at the same time. That's the thing, I am TRYING to do a good job at it all.
Last fall I saw the documentary Who Does She Think She Is, and it resonated so much with this questioning part of me that wonders if I can be a mother and an artist. A quote from one of the artists in the film is the best answer that I have so far:

Eventually your children will feel the call to use and explore their gifts very strongly, they will be better prepared to know how to do this if they have seen you (as the parent) do this in your own life, with your own gifts. This could be one of the best ways to prepare them for happiness and fulfillment.

So I am going to go on trying to get it all done, and giving myself to them when I can. The questions and self doubts will always be there. The answer lies in DOING.
And in taking little breaks to sit on the deck in the sunshine, wearing my current favorite necklace and bracelet set::

Loving Yellow

There is just something about YELLOW for me recently. Maybe its the springtime energy everywhere? Maybe its my dreaming of the coming summer sunshine and the extra hours of light that we are getting every evening? Maybe its all of the time that we have been spending on the deck and in the park these days watching all of the blossoms burst? Yellow has also been bursting into my recent paintings, like this one which I am thinking of calling Solstice.
I know that I am loving these saltwater sandals for Carys and I, they are sure to take us through summer and beyond while adding a little bit of this sunshine to our steps! This is our first attempt at mother/daughter matching, how could I resist?

After Dinner

Tonight, after the meal had been eaten but the plates had not been cleared, a magic moment happened: the sun really came out for the first time in days. We opened the door to the deck and got our feet wet enjoying the crisp freshness, and of course Jasper took some pictures.

Happy coincidence

The kitchen is where the photographing of my work happens these days. I could use my husband's studio in an old Gowanus warehouse, but the getting over there, setting up, taking the pictures and getting home just takes too long....plus our kitchen has the most lovely light flooded beauty in the afternoons. So, I am getting my new paintings ready for my show coming up next week and was taking pictures of a few of the pieces yesterday afternoon. I put this one new painting down on our kitchen table after I had photographed it and realized the happy coincidence that it harmonized completely with our table cloth, the lovely oil cloth from Anna Maria Horner's good folk's collection. I find moments like this, when the synchronicity of life comes together in a tangible way, so inspiring. I was left wondering, "Does my environment feed my work, or my work feed my environment?", and the lines all blurred. Of course, both of these questions are true. I made the painting and I choose the table cloth. One thing leading from conception to inspiration to create a total vision. I love catching glimpses of this!
The new painting is called Blessing.

May Day Snow

Jasper opened our inside shutters and "Said wow, it is so beautiful outside this morning Mommy, it snowed!". Hearing this on a May morning made me rush to the window to see that the "snow" covering the ground was actually our neighbor's crab apple tree's blossoms that had blown down all over our front stoop in the night. Recently, Jasper has been very excited about his new privilege of using the family camera. So of course the first thing he wanted to do was go outside and photograph the beauty! My coffee in hand the three of us went out to enjoy this gift. It seemed like a special blossom shower just for us as the petals were still falling.
A few weeks ago Jasper started asking to take pictures. Once I got over the initial hesitation about letting a 4.5 year old use my camera I realized that Jasper takes great pictures. He has a good eye, a fresh perspective, and he sees so many things that I might miss. I am always excited to see the pictures that he takes and often we end up with wonderful shots, like these. Another exciting thing for me about his new found love of the camera is that after almost 5 years I now do not have to always be behind the camera... and I just love his portraits of me, I get to see a little bit of how he sees Mama.